Negative Haircut Comments

Hi!

I've only posted a couple of times so I'm still feeling like a newbie.

I had my long hair cut short last winter.  My hair is baby fine with just enough wave and cowlicks to drive anyone insane.  When I was making my final decision to go short, I did the image thing at the salon, and was always discouraged from the nape-lengths, etc, because I am tall, large-boned, curvy, and a bit voluptuous--if yiou know what I mean.

But my face is oval, and I am not fat, so to everyone at the salon's surprise, the short haircut looked good.

I loved it, but wasn't feeling very stylish or chic.  My hair stylist eventually asked if she could cut my bangs to my forehead, and when this was done, it was clear that I would look good in an extremely short style, which is what I now have.  The length is somewhere between a long buzzcut and an ultra short pixie.  With the humidity around, it sticks up and is more of a buzzed style.

My friends and coworkers think it looks great, but the problem I have comes from complete strangers.  Last night I was having dinner with some friends at a popular restaurant and dance club.  While we were in the bar waiting for our table, a couple of nitwits started making loud comments about my haircut  They seemed to think this was amusing.  

I know this should not bother me, and for the most part, it doesn't.  I do not think my haircut is extreme, though it is very, very short.  This was not the first or only time I have had to respond to questions or comments about my haircut, which is nowhere near a headshave.  I don't mind questions or comments from people who ask what my male partner thinks, or how do I like it, etc., and I've also had guys ask me how to convince their gals to go short.  But it's the people who make the negative and judgemental comments that can really tick me off!

Has anyone experiened this? And how do you deal with it? Last night, ignoring did not seem to help.

Thanks!

I don't think you should have to respond to bad remarks.  *shrugs*  You can just feel better from knowing that every time those people open their mouths, anyone in earshot will know they are idiots.

Hi, your hair sounds cute! :-)

Some people can't except something different in this world, most people think that we all should be walking around with the same kind of hairstyle,  now wouldn't that be boring??

I love to be different!  My family is the same way, asking me why I would have my hair short and spiked like this and I should let it grow long (well I did have long hair but then they harped about it then too) so some people you just can't please, even in your own family UGH!!

But they are the ONLY ones who are negative about my hairstyle, whenever I go somewhere people are saying that they love my hairstyle and that they wished that they were daring enough to do the same with there hair.  I just haven't heard any negative comments from other people YET! haha

So you will always have someone who you can't please!

It really doesn't matter what other people say,  it's what YOU think about your hair, and if YOU like it then that's all that really matters!

Kim

Thanks!!!

I did let the management know what happened, but I'm not sure if the "manager" took me seriously.  A call the following day over his head to the supervisor was far more productive.

I love my hair short, and the shorter it has gotten, the better I like it.  If anyone had told me a year ago I'd have a buzz-cut and love it--I would have thought they were nuts.  But my hair had driven me crazy my whole life.  I went through zillionsof jugs jugs of gel, thickener, mousse, hairspray--no matter what hairstyle I had--it took HOURS of work in the morning.  The buzz takes 15 minutes (to tame the cowlicks). It may not be as flattering as one of my 2-hour "do's"--but who cares?  At least I have my sanity--and tons of leftover time in the morning.

Lorryann

I'm sure it's just as flattering, if not more so, than the styles that took two hours and a heap of product ^_^ .  Especially with fine hair, excessive product tends to make it look flat and greasy, anyway, so you're probably better off as you are.

Congratulations on the short pixie.  I love to see women with really short hair (partially because I can't stand to have lots of hair), it tells me that they are not conforming to society, and they want to show off their lovely facial structure.  It takes guts to do a pixie!  I'd love to see a picture of your hair before and after. 

Anyway about the people chuckling at you; are you sure they were chuckling at you?  If they were, they are stupid and mean and don't deserve to have any candy.

You must accept it as a fact of life that some men (and women) loathe short hair on women. Probably the nastiest comment you'll have said to your face is something like, "Why did you do that?" But behind your back, there *will* be incredibly rotten things said about your decision, esp. if it is very short, (none of which I would repeat here). I hear them all the time from people who know of my own love for *long* hair. However, even though I'm usually disappointed that pretty tresses have disappeared, about 75% of the time I think the new cut is at least decent.

The fact is that you like it, and most of your friends think it looks good. Who cares what others think? It's a big world, and you can't change much about it. You *can* express to those who make cutting remarks that you feel sad or angry about them. Some will care, and not do it again to another. Best, Bob  

I took that pic of myself with Lynn's camera while she was out of the room ^_^ .  I do think I look better in pics while smiling all happy, though she doesn't agree.  *shrugs*  She never likes the same stuff I do.

[QUOTE=eatgreenjello]BTW, Kuroneko, I like your new picture!  It looks so different from your last one.  Your smile is great.[/QUOTE]

Thank you Dave for standing up for us short-hair lovers.  I couldn't believe that Bob said those things about short hair on our beloved short hair board.

I really don't know why my honest comments would upset anyone. My wife has been bombarded with negative, rude remarks about her LONG hair on occasion. I prefer to think it's simply jealousy, embarrassment (from our girls- i.e., having a mom with extraordinarily long hair) or stodginess (her mom and other older relatives). It comes with the territory of venturing outside the norm. My advice remains: This is reality, so develop a thick skin and forget about it.

P.S. There are new folks here all the time. That is the only reason I am repetitive about my prediliction. Sorry! Also, in this case, to let people know that even some long hair fanatics are not hostile toward the "other side". Thanks, Bob

Bob,

I think you are missing the point.  I don't think your comments are dishonest, rather not appropriate for this forum.  Your comments came off as telling the person who received negative comments "well, you got what you deserved!".  That may not have been your intent, however that is how it was taken (at least the way I took it).  When you respond like you do on this board, you come off callous.  You may say "get a thick skin", but people come here for support, not ridicule.  Save your "got what you deserved" posts for the long hair board.

[QUOTE=Bob S]

I really don't know why my honest comments would upset anyone. My wife has been bombarded with negative, rude remarks about her LONG hair on occasion. I prefer to think it's simply jealousy, embarrassment (from our girls- i.e., having a mom with extraordinarily long hair) or stodginess (her mom and other older relatives). It comes with the territory of venturing outside the norm. My advice remains: This is reality, so develop a thick skin and forget about it.

P.S. There are new folks here all the time. That is the only reason I am repetitive about my prediliction. Sorry! Also, in this case, to let people know that even some long hair fanatics are not hostile toward the "other side". Thanks, Bob

P.S. There are new folks here all the time. That is the only reason
I

Hi Everyone,

I didn't expect my post to start a "thing" going, but here is my two-cents worth.

Bob, I respect your right to your preferences and opinions.  The world would be mighty dull if we all liked the same things, and had the same tastes in everything.

But I have a question--if you are a "long hair lover" then why are you reading and posting on a message board for "short" hair?  I realize you have every right to be here, but I don't understand your interest, or your desire to comment.

And yes, I agree that your post had a "you asked for it" undertone.  The people I encountered at the club most definitely were clueless, and, most unfortunately, drawing conclusions about my lifestyle based on my haircut.  One came right out and said I looked ugly. Very, very sad.  Are these the type of comments you are referring to--the ones allegedly being made "behind my back?"  Why would you suggest such a thing?

And as for the existence of those who "loathe" short hair on women--no kidding!!!  My partner was one of them, until he watched as I went short. I find that most people are able to keep an open mind,  "Different Strokes for Different Folks."

I shared this thread with my partner, he thought it was a hoot.  But his ultimate question was the same as mine--what is a long-hair afficionado doing on a short hair message board?  While I firmly believe thet we are are all entitled to our opinions, why express such a dissenting opinion here?

No offense intended ot taken--just a question.  I'm new to the world of really short hair.

BTW, I'll be going to a barbershop this weekend for a short buzz--can't wait!  I'll post some pix if I can get my computer working. I figured I may as well go all the way while I still have the nerve, and before I am forced to grow it out a bit for the winter.  It's too cold in New England to be buzzed all winter.

Best to All,

Lorryann

You are right. Thanks for your insight.

Lorryann

I'm going to second fatmoogas' opinion regarding Bob.

Can't wait to see pictures Lorryann.  Wish I could go with you to the barbershop.  Love seeing a woman in a barbershop.

AS for BOB = I like to visit the long hair discussion forum, even though I have short hair.  BUT, if I do post a reply on the long hair board, I carefully think about what I say before I post, to make sure I don't hurt the feelings of the long hair beauties.  And I especially wouldn't get on the long hair board and state my preference for short hair.  It wouldn't be appropriate on the long hair board.  That's why Admin set up these forums to be separated into groups for long hair, short hair, african american hair, dyed hair, and so on.

My thinking is a very different from yours.  I admire people with all lengths of hair because it is their individual style and says something about them.  Even though I like short hair on ME, I appreciate all hair lengths and styles and colors that other people choose to have.  That's the beauty of hair, it's all so different.

I really don't know why my honest comments would upset anyone. My wife has been bombarded with negative, rude remarks about her LONG hair on occasion. I prefer to think it's simply jealousy, embarrassment (from our girls- i.e., having a mom with extraordinarily long hair) or stodginess (her mom and other older relatives). It comes with the territory of venturing outside the norm. My advice remains: This is reality, so develop a thick skin and forget about it.

P.S. There are new folks here all the time. That is the only reason I am repetitive about my prediliction. Sorry! Also, in this case, to let people know that even some long hair fanatics are not hostile toward the "other side". Thanks, Bob

Sheesh, Dave, it must be hard to believe that I actually LIKE certain short hairdos, including pixies, wedges and bobs on many women. I loved pretty short hairstyles before I had ever seen truly beautiful *long* hair, and this wasn't until Jr. High. On occasion I even personally compliment a woman who is meticulous about making her short hair look pretty.

 I only visit the Short board if I see an intrigueing headine. I enjoy philosophical discussions about hair and everything else. My qualifiers about loving length are to prevent anyone from thinking I am trying to post stealthily. In the future, I will refrain from any discussion of length on this board. It clearly makes many here uncomfortable. Cordially, Bob