WHY ?
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URL: /forum_posts.php?TID=45008
Printed Date: Dec 26, 2024 at 9:25am
Topic: WHY ?
Posted By: mikecuts
Subject: WHY ?
Date Posted: Jul 6, 2006 at 9:30pm
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I have a question, Why do some ladies have no fear of loosing their long locks?I had a client and a friend come into the shop today. She is a standard bob style. Her friend wanted a short cliiper cut. she had some of the most thickest straightest hair I have ever seen. length was just about shoulder length. Of course my question is why do you want it cut and are you sure? Her reason was " I am sick of it and just want it gone" . I just wonder as a barber / stylist why... I do cut a lot of teenage and mid- age ladies styles both short and long. One of the big fads coming back is the nape being cliipped short with longer hair over it so when the hair is pulled up in a pony tail the clipperd nape is exposed. Do you see this in other area's of the USA?
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Replies: 47
Posted By: mikecuts
Date Posted: Jul 6, 2006 at 9:30pm
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I have a question, Why do some ladies have no fear of loosing their long locks?I had a client and a friend come into the shop today. She is a standard bob style. Her friend wanted a short cliiper cut. she had some of the most thickest straightest hair I have ever seen. length was just about shoulder length. Of course my question is why do you want it cut and are you sure? Her reason was " I am sick of it and just want it gone" . I just wonder as a barber / stylist why... I do cut a lot of teenage and mid- age ladies styles both short and long. One of the big fads coming back is the nape being cliipped short with longer hair over it so when the hair is pulled up in a pony tail the clipperd nape is exposed. Do you see this in other area's of the USA?
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Posted By: SanFranBrent
Date Posted: Jul 6, 2006 at 10:57pm
I often see young women and middle aged women with short hair, even
ultra-short hair.
It isn't a problem these days for a woman to wear
very short hair. And some women look adorable in ultra-short hairstyles.
It has been that way for decades really, going back to the short
permed bob cuts of the 1920s, up to the modern pixies and other
very short hairstyles of today in the 2000s.
I am in my 40s, and my entire life I have seen many women with short
hair, including my ex-wife, and the woman I am dating these days.
So why would it surprise you that some women like to wear short hair?
Just as some men like wearing long hair, or a beard, or earrings, or
whatever.
Different people have different styles.
Some women like to wear pantsuits, others like to wear skirts or
dresses.
Some women wear a nosestud in their pierced nostril, others
don't wear nose jewelry. Some women have gotten tattoos, others don't have tattoos. It is just fashion. It is
good that different people like different styles. It would be boring if
everyone had the same hair length, or hairstyle.
SanFranBrent2006-07-06 23:06:17 %,
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Posted By: anne6000
Date Posted: Jul 6, 2006 at 11:18pm
 ``&$ %```` $
I haven't personally seen this, but I've seen it on the internet. It's interesting to see the drastic difference between ultra short and long. I wouldn't personally choose this, but it's a unique look! 0- Ai
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Posted By: Rocky
Date Posted: Jul 7, 2006 at 11:37am
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I have to agree with Anne and Brent here... There are an infinite number of reasons people have style preferences, perceptions, fears, desires, etc. It's part of the human psyche. Everyone is different. No one will ever figure it out. It just is...
I also noticed you like talking about clippering women's hair and find a way to assert "as a barber / stylist" in almost every message you post. It seems a little odd to me. Are you a barber that gets pleasure from buzzing women's hair with a clipper? You sure like to talk about it a lot.
In my opinion, the look you get from clipper-cutting hair is too harsh (read butch) for most women. Using a clipper with a guide or length-specific blade (like a 3.5) follows the contour of the head too closely. It does not permit you to compensate for irregular growth patterns or bone structure. This is mitigated, to a degree, using a clipper-over-comb technique. Still, it does not offer as much control as a you get by employing a number of techniques using a variety of shears. You can cut hair every bit as short with shears but provide a cut tailored specifically to your client's hair type/texture. It just takes a little more time and skill than does plowing a clipper up the nape. If that's what the client desires, great. I think most women prefer the softer look, however.
I have not personally observed the fad of which you speak. It may have to do with demographics. I have seen styles trending a bit shorter and with more structure recently rather than the long, flat-ironed look with streaky highlights and low-lights that has been popular for a long time now (too long IMO). Bobs, more layers, graduation and texture are being employed. Clients have stopped "growing their hair out" and are willing to experiment with a variety of looks again. I like the shorter or medium-length styles more.
Rocky2006-07-07 11:41:16
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Posted By: kimspikedhair
Date Posted: Jul 7, 2006 at 11:54am
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Hi, I prefer my hair, short over long, because for me it's easier to style. I don't have to blow dry my hair (just towel dry). I bleach my own hair, (and cut it also). So having short hair, I don't get split ends from bleaching.(well atleast you can't see them) haha And plus I just like the look of short/spiked hair! 
Kim
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Posted By: HAWG
Date Posted: Jul 7, 2006 at 10:37pm
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I find it very disheartening the way ya'll have attacked Mike here. First off, nobody answered his question; it was a simple question:
Why do some ladies have no fear of loosing their long locks?
which seems to have continued to this post. It is simply an observation made by a trained/qualified hair cutter. Some, and I would venture to say most, women are very nervous when cutting their long hair short; his observation was that some women don't show this nervousness and was simply wondering why. His later comment about undercuts is simply just another observation; he is curious and just wants to find out if anyone has noticed this or if it is just happening in his local area.
For Mike, I haven't a clue as to why some women show no fear when getting their long hair cut short. I would venture a guess here and say that it was a deliberate and calculated decision; they understand the consequences (lots of hair on the floor and not on their head) and welcome the change. Those that have made the change and were very nervous about it probably can't wait to have it long again as they were probably not quite ready for the change. As for the undercut thing, ten years ago I lived on the North Carolina coast; I saw numerous undercuts but by no means was it the norm; in fact, it was a rarity. I saw variations from just an inch up from the hairline to all the way to the top of the ears. Personally, I like the look, especially when in a ponytail. It gives the nape a much cleaner look. Here in Texas, I have not seen an undercut in a very long time.
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Posted By: anne6000
Date Posted: Jul 8, 2006 at 6:01pm
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Just a thought here, but maybe there should be two forums to better serve the needs of people here. One would be about short hair (how to style and take care of it and discuss different styles, similar to the long hair board) and another one could be about haircutting, which is what a lot of people like mikecuts and Brent and others seem to prefer to discuss. That way, they could talk about cutting and buzzing women all they wanted because that would be the focus of the forum!0- Ai
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Posted By: Skydancer
Date Posted: Jul 8, 2006 at 6:28pm
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(a) Having a hair fetish does not necessarily mean you like de-feminizing women or you like forced haircuts.
(b) Just coz you have a hair fetish doesn't mean you can't be interested in hairstyles in a 'normal' way too. (It's like saying someone with a foot fetish can't buy shoes!)
(c) Having a fetish is not a bad thing in itself - obviously it depends on how you conduct yourself with it. Unwillingly forcing it on others is bad, but simply having isn't nor should anyone be made to feel bad about it.
(d) You can like extreme short cuts without having a fetish.
So give people a break, we're are all entitled to our own opinions and feelings and simply suggesting someone used clippers to cut their hair does not make that person a fetishist.
As a 10-year old a friend of my had a buzzed nape (by choice) because it was fashionable - I doubt at 10 that she had any kind of fetish. -- Pied!p pe ( 4` / 0b` 4(% (! $ !)(
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Posted By: HAWG
Date Posted: Jul 8, 2006 at 7:50pm
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Amen Skydancer
And I agree with you also, Anne. I'm not sure how to start a new forum though. It may be something that Karen our Dave has to do.
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Posted By: SanFranBrent
Date Posted: Jul 8, 2006 at 8:29pm
Anne, and Hawg,
I don't believe another board for short hairstyles is really necessary.
Most people on this board write good and interesting things about short
hairstyles.
Actually I am much more interested in short hairstyles on ladies than I
am on cutting hair. I don't have a cutting hair fetish, and I am not
interested in a board like that.
We are just discussing short hairstyles here on this board. Some people
(usually not myself) sometimes mention hair cutting also.
I personally like many short hairstyles on women ranging from shaved
heads, to buzzcuts, to short pixies, to chin length bob cuts, to
shoulder length bob cuts. I like varying styles and lengths of short hairstyles on
beautiful women.
I also agree with what Skydancer wrote.
My only criticism of what Claude wrote is that he shouldn't jump to
conclusions about people he doesn't really know, or be
condescending to others on the boards.
SanFranBrent2006-07-08 20:39:11 %,
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Posted By: Kuroneko
Date Posted: Jul 9, 2006 at 5:23am
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I just hate the way people are so quick to pounce on any short hair fans as freaks with weird fetishes, who need professional help, but not very often are such charges levelled against the long-hair fans of the boards -_- . It's very much a double standard, I think.
Anyway, in answer to the original question. . . The women who are frightened about cutting their hair are usually the ones who define themselves by their hair. They might just have old-fashioned ideas of gender roles and think only long-haired women are feminine or attractive. Or they might just have had long hair their whole lives and be nervous about what life will be like without it. If I were a stylist, I would definitely rather see a woman who's calm and sure in her decision, and confident in who she is as a person. I would want a client to feel happy with my work and not have any regrets. However, I wouldn't let that turn me into a coward who's afraid to make any major changes on anyone, the way I've seen with a lot of stylists. Hair, at least for me, is about being creative and trying new things. You can't do that if you're living in constant fear of your client's next mood swing. ! % Aaebade d !, ` . 4``
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Posted By: SanFranBrent
Date Posted: Jul 9, 2006 at 6:42am
I agree Kuroneko. There is a double standard concerning those who
appreciate short hairstyles on women, and those who prefer long
hairstyles on women. There are just as many long haired fetish websites
as there is short haired fetish websites.
And short haired women are just as feminine and sexy as longhaired women, sometimes even more so.
This double standard comes out of a bigoted, very conservative,
traditional oppressive orthodoxy that in some parts of the country
people still have, that "long hair on women fetish" is not a fetish,
but someone who appreciates short hairstyles on women has some sort of
fetish that the long haired appreciator doesn't, etc...
Even though the majority of women over 25 years old wear short or
fairly short hair, and there are many men who wear long hair, there are
still some backwards people that associate long hair with females.
This is slowly fading though, as women (and men) become more liberated in their hairstyle choices.
The fashion industry and the big cities always lead the way on fashion.
In the fashion industry and in the major metropolitan areas, women
these days wear their hair however they like, from ultra-short
hairstyles to long hair to everything in between. There are women
fashion models with shaved heads, short pixies, and short bob
hairstyles. Women wear dresses and skirts like they always did
(thankfully so, I love feminine dresses and skirts on women) but they
also wear jeans and pantsuits.
The modern woman is pretty liberated and has a greater selection of
hairstyle and clothing fashions than did women one hundred years ago.
Thankfully. And modern women are often very sexy and very feminine, as feminine and beautiful as they ever were, if not more so.
SanFranBrent2006-07-09 06:44:58 %,
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Posted By: mikecuts
Date Posted: Jul 9, 2006 at 9:00am
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how one word caused all this. I do appreciate the remarks. As for a barber/stylist its known as school, school school>>>>>>>>>. Let me just say this I have no fettish off cutting and or buzzing I just do my job and do it well. Do whats asked of you and bring a smile by making the inner self feel good. Is that what life is all about? We are here to learn not judge. I do feel Dave & Karen are doing a great job. Lets keep thsi a short hair forum for athers to learn from give advice when asked and keep up the great work.Kuroneko. Thanks for your answer bery well put mikecuts2006-07-09 09:01:31
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Posted By: Rocky
Date Posted: Jul 9, 2006 at 9:41am
That was kind of beautiful. 
By the way, there's an elephant in the room... again.
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Posted By: SanFranBrent
Date Posted: Jul 9, 2006 at 4:54pm
I can spot a couple of things that could be construed (or misconstrued) that way.
What might be a problem to some people might not be to others though. So who cares?
%,
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Posted By: anne6000
Date Posted: Jul 9, 2006 at 9:29pm
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[QUOTE=Kuroneko]I just hate the way people are so quick to pounce on any short hair fans as freaks with weird fetishes, who need professional help, but not very often are such charges levelled against the long-hair fans of the boards -_- . It's very much a double standard, I think.[/quote]
I would agree Kuroneko, but if you'll read the previous posts, it isn't a simple liking of shorter hair. It's all the talking of buzzing women down like it's a sport and the automatic responses that don't seem to take each individual into account. There is a constant underlying theme from some individuals (not you) that every short haircut on a woman could be even shorter and that every short haircut is automatically the greatest thing she could ever do.
It's like someone looking at photographs and paintings and saying that every one is a masterpiece. After awhile, that opinion seems rather worthless.
[quote]The women who are frightened about cutting their hair are usually the ones who define themselves by their hair.[/quote]
I've never known anyone who was actually frightened! I think women with long hair simply prefer their hair long just like women with short hair prefer their short hair and aren't "frightened" to grow it.
0- Ai
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Posted By: SanFranBrent
Date Posted: Jul 9, 2006 at 11:27pm
Anne,
This is the short hairstyle board. Just about everyone that writes on
these boards, men and women alike, like many different short hairstyles
on women; from shaved heads, to short crops, to short pixies, to chin
length bobs, etc..
A short hairstyle on many women, not all women, IS the best hairstyle
for many of them! Many times I have seen a woman with a plain, drab
shoulder length or even longer hairstyle, go to a short bob
hairstyle or short pixie hairstyle and look much better. More
beautiful, fashionable, and feminine.
As far as buzzing or shaving their heads, the bald look is just one
short style on a woman. There is various short hairstyles on women that can look good on ladies, from short bob styles,
to short pixies, etc..
SanFranBrent2006-07-09 23:31:54 %,
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Posted By: Hal
Date Posted: Jul 10, 2006 at 7:15am
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Brent... One of the very first topics it "This is Not An Fetish board". Those who think very one needs a "very short Pixie", an "inverted bob, "buzzed nape" or "clipper cut" really flirt with the line of like and fetish.
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Posted By: SanFranBrent
Date Posted: Jul 10, 2006 at 7:40pm
Hal, those are hairstyles, amongst other hairstyles. It doesn't
necessarily have anything to do with a fetish.
And who is to say it is
wrong to like those hairstyles?, (as obviously many of the men and women
on these boards do).
For that matter, is it wrong to have fashion
fetishes or preferences?,( as all people do).
We are getting into the philisophical with statements like that. Into subjective areas.
As I stated before in one of my posts, one person's definition of a fetish is another person's
defintion of an acceptable hairstyle. What one person considers weird,
another person considers pleasurable and a nice fashion style.
To me a weird fetish hairstyle is short, blue colored, spiky hair. That
would be a weird, fetish hairstyle to me, I wouldn't want
my lady or my daughter wearing it.
However an ultra-short pixie on a woman
is perfectly acceptable to me, whether anyone believes it a fetish or
not. But that is just my definition of what
is and isn't acceptable. Others many disagree with me.
There is no way to objectively determine what hairstyle consitutes a
"fetish hairstyle" and what hairstyle is "mainstream" enough not to be
considered a "fetish" hairstyle. It is completely subjective.
Just as
beauty is subjective and a personal preference.
Ted Danson once said that Whoppi Goldberg was a
very beautiful woman. And I have read on the internet one person who
said that Halle Berry wasn't that beautiful.
I would prefer to get it on with Halle Berry when she is wearing
an ultra-short pixie, than get it on with Whoppi Goldberg with her long
hair. Does that mean that I have a fetish for women in short pixie
hairstyles?
So your definition of a fetish style might be different than mine is.
Realistically no one can deternine what is or isn't a "fetish". What is
a "fetish" for one person might be acceptable for another.
The whole concept of "fetish" vs. "mainstream" is bogus anyway. How
would you even define it? People would have different definitions on
what consitutes a fetish and what constitutes mainstream.
And fashion is always changing. What was a fetish ten years ago
might
be mainstream today.
Years ago short spiky hair on women was considered
a fetish. Now it isn't. Years ago tattoos, a pierced nostril, in some
places even pierced ears, were considered forms of a fashion fetish on
women. They aren't today. There are so many women these days who have
tattoos, have pierced ears, or even a pierced nostril, that it has gone
from being
a so-called "fetish" fashions to so-called "mainstream", or at least
fairly
common fashion styles.
An ultra-short pixie like Halle Berry, Alyssa Milano, Charlize Theron, Natalie Portman, or Toni Braxton have worn, might
be considered a "fetish hairstyle" by you, but it would be a completely
acceptable hairstyle to others. It is certainly acceptable on women to
me. I love those hairstyles on women, and have been with women who had
hairstyles that short or even shorter than that, and I loved it on them.
It would be an amazingly boring and oppressive world if we were only
allowed certain hairstyles. That is how the Communists and the Islamic
Fascists do it. They only allow certain hairstyles or fashions that
they consider acceptable.
But as I stated, it is subjective anyway. One person's fetish hairstyle
is another person's acceptable hairstyle.
We don't need the "hairstyle
police" telling us whether a hairstyle is a "fetish" or not, or how to percieve or wear hairstyles.
We are in America, a free country, not in an oppressive totalitarian
state like Iran or North Korea. Each of us should be allowed to
determine for ourselves how we want to wear our hair and what we
consider acceptable hairstyles.
Now having said all of that, do I believe there is such a thing as
fetishes, or fetish hairstyles? Yes I do believe that, but what is a
fetish hairstyle for me, might not be for you, and visa versa. Every
person doesn't agree on what exactly constitutes a fetish hairstyle or
fetish fashions.
They should always agree with me on fashion, but sometimes they actually don't, which means they are probably wrong, doesn't it?
SanFranBrent2006-07-10 21:03:21 %,
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Posted By: SanFranBrent
Date Posted: Jul 10, 2006 at 8:34pm
I will give you a few examples on what I consider acceptable hairstyles
and fashions, and hairstyles or fashions that I consider weird "fetish"
styles or unacceptable.
Acceptable hairstyles on women;
Any short hairstyle. Ranging from shaved heads, buzzcuts, short crops,
short pixies, long pixies, short bob cuts, long bob cuts, short permed
hair, short straight hair.
I believe women like Natalie Portman, Janice Robinson, and Bai Ling, looked beautiful in the bald look.
Halle
Berry, Alyssa Milano, and Sharon Stone look adorable in short pixie
hairstyles.
Short bob hairstyles are gorgeous on many women.
Also any medium length hairstyle on women.
Jennifer Lopez, Jennifer Aniston, and Cindy Crawford, look good in medium length hair.
Also any long hair length on women except really, really long, like past knee length.
Jessica Simpson looks good in long hair.
Weird fetish or unacceptable hairstyle on women;
Any unnatural color of hair, such as blue, pink, orange, green, etc..
Long hair on one side of the head and a shaved head on the other side of the head.
Hair length that is too long, like past knee length, dragging on the floor, etc...
Other fashions;
Acceptable to me;
Pierced ears, and pierced nostrils on women.
Pierced ears on men (but not pierced nostrils).
Tattoos on men or women (except facial tattoos).
Skirts or dresses on women.
Jeans or pantsuits on women.
High heels or low heels on women.
Pantyhose on women.
Makeup on women.
Lipstick on women.
Unacceptable to me;
Pierced lips or pierced genitalia on men or women.
Pierced nostrils on men.
Skirts on men, (except sarongs or kilts).
High heels on men.
Pantyhose on men.
Makeup on men.
Lipstick on men.
I am sure most people agree with me on all of this.
My definitions of what is acceptable or what isn't acceptable should be what people should follow.
SanFranBrent2006-07-10 21:10:25 %,
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Posted By: anne6000
Date Posted: Jul 10, 2006 at 10:15pm
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Brent, with all due respect, I think you're skirting the entire issue.
[quote]I would prefer to get it on with Halle Berry when she is wearing an ultra-short pixie....[/quote]
Halle Berry's hair is certainly short, but who ever argued about her having a fetish haircut?
What you seem to be avoiding is the emphasis on the cutting of the hair. There's a lot of talk about buzzing women down and clippercuts. Quite frankly, it sounds like some people get aroused not just with looking at a woman with short hair, but about the actions of getting there. That's what is disturbing. There seems to be little regard for the individual woman and actual style, other than "buzzes," "pixies" and "bald." Yet you and no one else have addressed this issue and insist on arguing that short hair is not a fetish. I think almost every long-haired woman would agree that short hair, by itself, is simply a hairstyle choice, and not necessarily a fetish.
But it's the way that you present your preference for the short hair that is rather odd.
[quote]To me a weird fetish hairstyle is short, blue colored, spiky hair. [/quote]
Take out the blue -- do you think a weird hairstyle is short, spiky hair? I'll be surprised if you answer this since many of the hairstyles that are discussed here are exactly that.
Once again, it isn't short hair as a subject all by itself that anyone is objecting to. It's the really excited way that many people respond to anyone who is contemplating short hair. There is rarely anything said that doesn't highly encourage a woman to cut it just as short as she can. If that's what a woman wants, I think most of us will agree that her preference always comes first. But, as I said before (many seem to ignore what they find uncomfortable), if the opinions on short hair are that it's always going to look just stunning, and that a woman should consider going shorter and even bald, those are answers that are given more to suit someone's personal fetish than to offer sincere advice to someone truly seeking a style that might suit her personality and face the best.
All women are not the same, yet the same regurgitated replies are given to nearly all women who ask about different short hairstyles. That's what turns the discussion into a fetish.
Oddly enough, you always bring tattoos and piercings into discussion on hair. Any particular reason why?
[quote]It would be an amazingly boring and oppressive world if we were only allowed certain hairstyles.[/quote]
Again, you're completely skirting the issue by arguing against yourself. No one ever said that we should all have the same hairstyles.
You are under no obligation to write a response, but if you do, please don't insult our intelligence by completely avoiding the subject and arguing against something else entirely.
0- Ai
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Posted By: PurpleBubba
Date Posted: Jul 10, 2006 at 10:58pm
The thing I have seen that bothered me is what I've seen happen when someone asks for advice. Everyone chimes in with their opinions. Then the person makes a choice and comes back with a picture. And then someone has to chime in and say cut it shorter or next time get ______. It's as if they could care less whether the person likes the style or not. They just want it done their way.
And yes there are extremes like that on long hair sites. I've seen posts where someone with knee length hair will talk about cutting their hair back to waist length and some posters will chime in like they are committing a sin.
This isn't necessarily about telling someone to cut or grow. It's about not telling people to get a certain style just because you like the style. It's about giving them multiple options and letting them choose and then either being happy for them if they are happy or helping them again if they are not.
PurpleBubba2006-07-11 09:10:13 |
Posted By: SanFranBrent
Date Posted: Jul 11, 2006 at 1:36am
Points well taken by both of you folks.
Myself, I don't have a hair cutting fetish.
And I could care less about tattoos on women one way or the other. I
just mentioned tattoos as an example of something that wasn't
often acceptable on women years ago, but now it is more acceptable.
I just like short hairstyles on women. There are many types of short hairstyles I like on beautiful women.
It seems to me that some of the people that post here on this board might have a hair
cutting fetish, but that doesn't bother me. You expect that on a short
hair board, just as many people have a long hair fetish on long hair
boards.
As long as they are not obnoxious or rude to people about it, who cares?
It seems to me that most of the people who post on these boards are
fairly respectful to others and generally helpful and complimentary.
Some people are better than others at giving hairstyle advice.
Not everyone says on this board, all of the time, to do things like
buzz the nape, or get a short angled bob cut, or shave your head, or
get it cut even shorter than you have it if it is already very short
hair.
There are a variety of responses, (although generally people here on
this board do encourage women to try short hairstyles, which is to be
expected, since both the men and the women here on these boards are
mostly short hair lovers on women).
If anyone believes this board is like a fetish board, then you have
never been on a fetish board. I assure you, it is very different than
this type of board.
I do sometimes encourage a woman to cut her hair short if she asks
about that.
I usually compliment a woman if she posts a photo of herself
in her new short hairstyle if I like the hairstyle.
I usually
leave it at that, unless she asks if she could go shorter with her
hairstyle, and then, if I believe she could, which I often do, I tell her
that.
SanFranBrent2006-07-11 01:57:09 %,
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Posted By: Hal
Date Posted: Jul 11, 2006 at 8:17am
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BRENT - Thank you so much for making my case for me.....lol
Hal
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Posted By: SanFranBrent
Date Posted: Jul 11, 2006 at 3:05pm
What case Hal? You never had a case!
At any rate, I am glad you appreciate my wisdom.
Now if I could only get everyone to agree with me, how much better the world would be, I am sure of that!
%,
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Posted By: CarolNY
Date Posted: Jul 11, 2006 at 6:59pm
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a fetish is only a problem if the fetish becomes more important than the person in a relationship.
.................. in other words;
if a man has a foot fetish and his wife wearing high heels is more important than she is to him.
............ or if a man insists or forces upon his wife a certain hair style, whether she likes it or not.
most people have fetishes and it is usually harmless.
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Posted By: SanFranBrent
Date Posted: Jul 11, 2006 at 8:32pm
Carol,
Of course it is wrong for a man to force a woman to get a certain hairstyle! I would never do that!
I agree with you that most people are harmless with their fetishes.
All people have fashion fetishes of one sort or another. If you don't
have some type of fetish or strong preferences you aren't human.
Fetishes are natural and contribute to human sexuality and human
sensuality.
In my first marriage, my wife and I were gradually growing apart, and
we were having intimacy less often. At that time she was wearing a drab
plain shoulder length hairstyle, and wasn't really dolling herself up
very often either.
But she knew I loved short hairstyles on women. I never forced it on
her, or even told her to get a shorter hairstyle, but she knew by the
comments I made about women, that I appreciated short hairdos on women.
One day I came home, and my wife had gone to the beauty salon and
gotten her shoulder length hair cut off into an adorable short pixie
hairstyle, and she was all dolled up in a sexy short dress, with makeup
and long dangle earrings on, and did she ever look good! Believe me, we
had our fun that evening!
It was just what our marriage needed to spice it up.
Within a year, our first child was born, my oldest daughter who is these days in her teen years.
It is good for couples to know what pleases each other, what preferences or fetishes that they have.
I can assure you, it works, it worked brilliantly for us.
We ended up having three kids.
We eventually got divorced, but it had nothing to do with hairstyles, we just grew apart and went our own ways.
I still see my ex-wife though on the weekends when I see my kids. We have a congenial relationship.
In most societies, fetishes are accepted, and are part of human sensuality and human sexuality.
It is mostly in the traditional American-Anglo-Saxon culture, that
fetishes are frowned upon and considered "abnormal". This comes out of
the American-Anglo-Saxon, Puritan, Victorian tradition of being uptight
about sexuality, and sexual expression.
Just as for years in Anglo culture, sex was supposed to be limited to the missionary position between married couples.
And fetishes were associated with other cultures that Anglos felt
superior to, or that Anglos thought were "less civilized" or "less
moral", like the Latins, French, Africans, etc..
This attitude toward fetishes unfortunately still prevails in some
reactionary, Victorian sections of the American public.
Which might
also explain why America has a higher rate of people going to
psychiatrists than most other societies, and also has a disproprtionate
percentage of Christians who turn to radical, fundamentalist, Victorian
sects of Christianity than most other Christian countries.
Americans,
as a reaction to this sexual uptightness, also visit porn sites more
often than people in most other countries. There is more porn produced
in American than any other country, by far.
Only when Americans get past this oppressive, Victorian age, sexual
mores, will they really be as healthy as they should sexually.
There is progress however. I believe Americans are gradually breaking
down Puritan, Victorian era, sexual oppression and that many American
couples are becoming sexually healthier in their marriages and
relationships.
Probably the only place more uptight about human sexuality, human
"fetishes", etc. than the United States is, is the Muslim World, which is
incredibly oppressive in regards to sexuality and sexual expression, at
least amongst Muslim fundamentalists, who are the same folks who
oppress women, and sometimes gravitate into religious and political
fanaticism.
Women in particular, (both in traditional Anglo-Saxon, Victorian era
tradition, and certainly amongst the fanatical, misognistic, Muslim
fundamentalists), are supposed
to be almost non-sexual creatures, which is very strange for adults,
male or female.
SanFranBrent2006-07-11 21:22:19 %,
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Posted By: anne6000
Date Posted: Jul 11, 2006 at 11:10pm
| < @@.,'0@ 0%d@@
Probably, but it isn't completely harmless here. When nearly every short haircut is applauded with unbridled enthusiasm and chants by several of the predictable "CUT IT SHORT!!!!" and "You'll LOVE it!" responses (how can someone know what a stranger will love?) then the opinions are fueled by nothing but a fetish/obsession which is very narrow in focus.
That isn't discussion. That's just propaganda to get women to cut off their hair for the cheap thrill of others. That bothers me greatly when there are several young girls posting here. It's all just kind of creepy.
0- Ai
|
Posted By: SanFranBrent
Date Posted: Jul 12, 2006 at 12:02am
You are being too defensive Anne. Relax lovely lady. I like your posts, but you get too defensive sometimes Anne.
First of all, not everyone is saying that. They are saying lots of
things, including discussion of short hairstyles in various ways. You
are being selective in what you are reading, and in your interpetation
in what people are writing on this short haired board. Many women have
recieved good advice on this short haired board regarding short
hairstyles. Some of them have reported back to us on how much they like
their short hairstyles. Some of these ladies have even shown us photos
of themselves in their new short hairstyles.
Secondly there is nothing "creepy" about hairstyle preferences, or
enthusiasm for certain hairstyles, including short and ultra-short
hairstyles on women.
If you believe the people here are creepy, you
should go over on the long haired board and read how they gush over
long hair. Talk about fetishes! It makes this board look tame in
comparison.
If we were to be prohibited from complimenting short hairstyles on
women, or encouraging young ladies to wear cute, adorable short
hairstyles, then you might as well shut this board down, since the fun
and enjoyment of women wearing short hair is the encouragement and
appreciation they get from other people who appreciate them in
attractive short hairstyles. And many, if not most of the women, who
write on this short hair board either already have short hair, or are
looking to wear a short hairstyle. That is the reason for this board.
The short hair board = short hairstyles.
The long hair board = long hairstyles.
You get it now dear lady?
Thirdly, everything we write can't be with 12 or 13 year olds in mind.
I have heard this argument before on messageboards, that every little thing we say has to be "G" rated.
That is almost impossible considering the vast majority of people who
read and write on this website are in their late teens or are adults.
It would make for pretty uninteresting conversations if we all had to
converse like 12 year olds.
And I am sensitive on what I write, I have three kids myself. That is why I don't use overtly sexual language, swear
words, or ethnic or religious slurs, etc.. And I try and be respectful to people, whether or not I agree with them.
But I do speak on grown-up topics on occasion, in what I believe is a way that isn't destuctive to children.
I do protect my kids, as does my ex-wife, but I don't overly protect
them. They are going to learn that different people like different
hairstyles, even extreme hairstyles. That won't destroy the kids any.
It could be worse. The kids in Baghdad are living in homes without
electricity, dodging bombs and bullets.
A 13 year old finding out that
some men like short or even ultra-short hair on women, isn't all that
destructive. That kid's own mom might wear short or ultra-short hair,
as many women do,( including the woman I am currently seeing, and my ex
wife, who is a mother of three healthy, well-adjusted children).
What is disturbing Anne is not how people write on this board. They
have been writing like this for the three years I have been frequenting
this website, without much of a problem.
What is disturbing is how you, since you have come on the boards, you seem so upset by what some people are writing.
You worry a little too much lovely lady.
As Kurineko has pointed out on this board, there is a double standard
regarding the long haired board and the short haired board on this Hair
Boutique website.
Time and again on the long haired board, people say over and over again
how much they love long hair, and how everyone on the board should grow
long hair, and they are far more enthusiastic and far more "fetishist"
about long hair than anyone is here about short hairstyles.
The guy who
runs the long haired board has long hair almost to his ankles. Now
that is an extreme!!! (Not that it is bad for a man to have hair that
long, that is cool if someone wants to grow their hair that long, but
it is very extreme).
Yet the folks on the long hair board, no matter
how extreme their hair is, or how "fetishistic" they get in their
enthusiam for long hair on men or women, get a free pass, and they are
not accused of being "fetishist", even though they profess more of a
long haired fetish on women, than most of us do regarding a short hair
fetish on women.
I contend that it is the " Victorian/puritans", who are always looking for
" hairstyle fetishists", who are the ones who have the hangup, not the people who
write on this board.
We were all getting along fine on this short hair
board, and many different people wrote in, with many different ideas
about short hairstyles.
I read many posts that I don't like Anne. If you are bothered by a
particular post, ignore it. I do this one this website and other websites. That's what grown ups do. We ignore it.
But please don't come here on these boards and write to myself and others who have been
writing on this website for several years, (and for the most part getting along well with
people), and insinuate that we are "creepy fetishists". We aren't. We are as "normal"
as you are Anne.
I work. I am fairly well educated. I am middle class. I don't take drugs, I am
responsible. I have three great kids. I date nice women. I am usually nice to people. I pay my
taxes. I like sports. I like music. I am a fairly normal guy.
I just happen to like short hairstyles on women. I
have always liked that and it hasn't hurt me any, on the contrary, I
have had a wonderful time with short haired ladies.
It hasn't hurt anyone else either. If anything it is postive.
And
adorable short haired women are certainly not creepy. On the contrary,
they are beautiful!
SanFranBrent2006-07-12 00:54:56 %,
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Posted By: anne6000
Date Posted: Jul 12, 2006 at 12:37am
|
Brent, I do not want to insult you, but most of your reply addresses different topics that you introduced, and with all due respect, you're arguing only against yourself and ironically, telling me that I'm the one doing the selective reading.
One important difference to point out is that is going from short hair to long by growing is not the same as going from long to short.
Going from short to long can take many years, and the person can change their mind at any moment and cut the hair if the decision changes.
Going from long to short takes literally minutes, and once it's done, it's going to be a long time to get the hair back. Therefore, a decision to cut the hair should be weighed a lot more heavily than a decision to grow the hair long. The comparison isn't even.
[quote]And adorable short haired women are certainly not creepy. [/quote]
Unfortunately, you're not reading my words very carefully. I never said that short hair was creepy at all. Please do not put words into my mouth.
With respect to what someone else said, I'm just not comfortable with the elephant in the room. To me, discussion, especially about something like cutting hair that could potentially harm someone's self-esteem if it isn't done for the right reasons, usually involves weighing several factors. Unfortunately, the elephant is holding down the scales at one end.
I'm sure my post isn't comfortable to read, and I'm not trying to insult anyone but to ignore that tiny elephant simply isn't my idea of healthy discussion. The Victorian/Puritan view would be not to discuss the issue at all, and I feel quite the opposite.
However, at this point, I don't feel that much else can be said that hasn't been already, so I'll quietly bow out of the conversation now.
0- Ai
|
Posted By: Kuroneko
Date Posted: Jul 12, 2006 at 12:39am
|
*giggle* As if to prove your point there. . . not only am I an anime fan, but I grew up on "Jem", so blue (or green, purple, pink, crayon-red, etc.) hair seems perfectly normal to me. A woman with short, spiky blue hair would actually be quite appealing to me ^_^ .
| <P $ pa` `$ ! % Aaebade d !, ` . 4``
|
Posted By: SanFranBrent
Date Posted: Jul 12, 2006 at 12:49am
Anne, you are missing my point.
If you want to talk about "fetishists" and "elephants in the room", check out the Long haired board.
We aren't any worse than they are, and as people have pointed out, there is a double standard.
Any discussion of hairstyles preferences, or fashion preferences, involves
potential sexuality, sensuality, and fetishes. Fashion is sensual. If we worried about that, we couldn't even have a
website like this. I don't worry about it.
And most of the people on this website are respectful, and they have
given good advice to women.
People know this because many women over
the past three years have reported back to us telling us they like
their new short hairstyle. If you were on this board for awhile, over
several years, you would know that.
I'm not uncomfortable with your posts Anne. I am sure other people
aren't uncomfortable with your posts either. I just believe you are
looking too hard to try and find "fetishists", when most of the posts
simply express hairstyle suggestions, comments on hairstyles, or
preferences on hairstyles. It really isn't all that devious.
And as I stated, there is a sexual/sensual quality to many types of
hairstyles and fashion styles, as well as an athestic and artistic
quality, but it isn't necessarily devious, in fact part of the fun of
fashion is the sex appeal, the sensuality of fashion, as well as it's
beauty, and it's artistic expression.
As far as my posts go, I don't argue for topics I have brought up with
my own posts, I bring up concepts to make a point, and I analyse your
and other posts and how you have responded to my posts and other
people's posts.
As far as your long haired/short haired comparison:
Hair grows back Anne. In a year and a half, a woman can go from a short pixie to shoulder length hair.
So your argument that a woman going to a short hairstyle could be
horrible for her, actually isn't true. It is not a risk free world, and
someone cuttiing their hair short, in the scheme of things, is a very
minor risk to take.
And the woman might just be delighted with her new short hairstyle.
SanFranBrent2006-07-12 01:12:09 %,
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Posted By: SanFranBrent
Date Posted: Jul 12, 2006 at 12:50am
Kuroneko,
You are one of the people that makes this website work. You contribute good posts.
So wear your hair however you like dear lady, in any silly color you like!
SanFranBrent2006-07-12 01:02:02 %,
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Posted By: Kuroneko
Date Posted: Jul 12, 2006 at 12:59am
|
Cool, I have permission ^_^v . I actually did dye my hair blue last week. Unfortunately, it's mostly washed out now, so it's barely visible anymore :-( . Fortunately, there are pics from the day I did it, so as soon as my friend pulls them off her camera, I'll be able to make a great new avatar ^_^ !
| !p`.$#$ 0Ab@ ! % Aaebade d !, ` . 4``
|
Posted By: DarkHelmet
Date Posted: Jul 12, 2006 at 1:38am
|
Interesting thread.
Sorry I lost everyone when people starting writing about some Elephant thing.
Sorry I dont know net lingo, so I kinda got lost in reading the discussion and the term Elephant in the room. Is it like in the old cartoons when people who dranks saw elephants?
As for this whole topic. The only thing I could say that hasnt been said is.
I think some people feel talking about woman getting their hair cut short and clippers plowing and all that jazz and words that was used is fetish talk abd different then people talking about woman with long hair not being a fetish because, growing your hair out isnt really an act that has instant gratification. Cutting long hair off is an act that for whatever the reason the wearer is doing can be gratifing to people who have a haircutting fetish.
However I see nothing wrong with discussing one's personal preference on length's of hairstyles. Be it short or long. Hair is hair, and you can do anything you want with it.
I think everyone made good points, but simply put, I dont think any style preference is a fetish. As far as the double standard i see where it comes from. As far as sexual turn on's and fetishes, the whole "transforming process" that has taken a foothold on soceity and the idea of controlling someone; else's look isnt soley exclusive to cutting hair. Makeoever shows' are the bread and butter of controlling and getting off on controlling someone else looks. From the viewers who watch them to the "friends" who ambush the person who is told they need a total makeover.
So it would be hard to say this whole telling someone how thwy shoudl llok or statign one;s personal hair length preference is a fetish when you have countless talks hows where self proclaimed "experts" are telling others what color and cut the person on the show should have as well as what they should wear, all based on that person's ideals.
I think the basis of hair fetishes that involve buzzing, clippers, clipping and becoming aroused talking about or trying to presuade someone into getting short hair is rather simple to explain.
It is an act. In regards to the double standard of hair fetishes I think that's very true.
The problem with why growing your hair down to your butt or knee's isnt labeled by many as a hair feitsh even though I'm sure there's people who get "off"on talking about that is that it isnt an act.
Sure some people could get off on being able to force someone to wear long hair but it doesnt compare to the thrill or instant gratifcation a person get's knowing someone cut all their hair off in an minute.
Society is impatient and has little control on what goes on in the world , as much as we hate to admit it.
I think fetishes, that alter others apperances stem from being able to control. We shouldnt judge that though. As long as no one is being harmed or phyiscally forced to cut their hair. I just see how when you do have people on boards who automatically say " cut it off" or go shorter next time, that their thought process is based on the thrill or excitment they get knowing someone might actually listen to them and wear their hair in a style that the person likes or is aroused from.
That being said just because someone prefer's short hair, or pixes, or bobs, or calls woman beuatiful who all have that style doesnt mean they are causing harm or should be labled a deviant anf someone who needs help because they have a fetish.
No one accuses woman who prefer guys with shaved heads or very short clippred hair as woman with hair fetishes. Yet they are many many woman out there that only like guys with one particular style of hair.
Why because society thinks that style is the norm?
You see there are double standards and notihng is so black and white and some people would like you to think. Everything including hair and styles and like and dislikes and preferneces and opinions are all shades of gray I'm afraid to say.
|
Posted By: CarolNY
Date Posted: Jul 12, 2006 at 2:12am
|
fashion and hairstyles are all about two things;
one- an art form
two -sex
every woman wants to feel alluring.
|
Posted By: SanFranBrent
Date Posted: Jul 12, 2006 at 2:44am
Dark Helmet,
The "elephant in the room" expression means something that people are
not discussing on the boards but is there, in this case sex, or sexual
"fetishes" (at least some people believe that is a problem. I don't. As
Carol mentioned, fashion by nature is sexual and sensual as well as
being beautification and an artistic expression ).
You mentioned Dark Helmet, the act of haircutting as a type of "fetish".
What about those of us who have no particular fetish for cutting
women's hair, we just like short hairstyles on women, because we
believe that women
look better that way?
How is that any different than someone liking
women with long hair because they believe women look better that way?
So there is a double standard by some people in this regard.
There is also a double standard by some people regarding men with long hair, as well
as women with short hair.
But for decades now, since the "hippie days"
of the 1960s, there have been men with long hair. When I was a kid
growing up I saw long haired men all over the place.
I also saw many short haired women.
And for even many more decades in western society
there have been women with short hair.
Look at photos of women in the 1920s, with those ultra-short bob cuts
they wore.
There has continuously, for nearly a century, been women in
the western world wearing short or ultra-short hairstyles.
So after all these many decades of many long haired men, and even many
more short haired women, why do some people still regard it as a "fetish" if
a woman prefers a man with long hair, or a man prefers a woman with
short hair?
Obviously it isn't the hair length that determines whether a man is
masculine, or a woman is feminine.
Some of the sexiest, most feminine,
most beautiful, most adorable women I have ever seen, wear their hair
in ultra-short hairstyles! I love the look, feel, and sensuality of a
beautiful, feminine woman with an adorable short hairstyle.
That is one of the reasons I stated that this idea of long haired women
and short haired men, is a "left over" fashion ideals from the Victorian age of the
1800s.
There have been many times throughout human history in various
cultures, that men have had long hair, women short hair, or visa versa.
We are in an age these days in the western world where men can wear
long or short hair, and women can wear long or short hair. Knowing
this, to refer to anyone's preference as a "fetish" indicates the
stupidity of the person accusing someone of having a "fetish".
As I stated in a previous post, what is considered a "fetish" fashion
style, a few years later might be considered a relatively "mainstream"
fashion style. That is the nature of style and fashion. It would be
pretty boring if it never changed. I like some of the fashion changes
better than others. But I am sure that is true with everyone. We all
have the traditional classic styles we like, and the more modern styles
that we like.
I enjoy the freedom people have these days, both men and women, to wear their hair either long or in a short hairstyle.
SanFranBrent2006-07-12 03:22:18 %,
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Posted By: SanFranBrent
Date Posted: Jul 12, 2006 at 2:59am
Carol,
I agree. Of course the beauty and fashion industries play on sex appeal.
I know that the women I know never feel more attractive than after they
leave the beauty salon with a new hairstyle, and then get all dolled up
in a sexy dress, nylons, high heels, their makeup, long dangle earrings
and jewelry, etc., and go out on the town and show off their new
hairstyle, and sexy clothes and attractive jewelry.
Why do you think that women like shopping for attractive and beautiful clothes and
jewelry, and love going to the beauty salon for a new hairstyle, and get
their nails done, a facial and so forth?
Part of it, I am sure, is the
social experience of being with the ladies at the beauty salon. And I
am sure it is relaxing for them. But it is also a sensual experience
for women, and makes them feel sexy, fashionable, and desirable.
Nothing wrong with that!
SanFranBrent2006-07-12 03:22:48 %,
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Posted By: demodoll
Date Posted: Jul 12, 2006 at 12:32pm
|
I don't know that hairstyles and fashion are always about sex or sexuality. I work for a large corporation and have for the last 21 years. Most of the people who work there are trying (breaking their necks actually) to get ahead and their clothing and hairstyles are a direct reflection of that. Any hint of sexy is definitely NOT what you would want to do to get ahead in that place. It is much more conforming to the culture to look polished, professional, and conservative. That is not for everyone, of course, but for those who want that world sexy is the absolute last thing they would ever do. And there is nothing wrong with that. It is a conscious choice that some people make to get what they want.
So I think that hairstyles and fashion can also be about career and getting ahead in whatever chosen one a person has. $ S bd`ter - ,,bb - 0b` /4! $(!, $- $%%, ` "6
|
Posted By: Merlin101
Date Posted: Jul 12, 2006 at 1:51pm
|
Brent, thank you for your truthful insights. Especially, concerning the history of cultural norms across ethnic backgrounds and certainly across the centuries. Life and culture didn't magically appear in the late 1700's, so for the love of life, will people stop making generalizations about culture as if it did.
Anne, please get over the paranoia that everyone wants you to cut your hair. I doubt you can locate ten people that really care. Everytime you post, you mention how everyone is out to get you to cut your hair. Eventually, you become rude and argumentative and close with telling the other participate they are "arguing against themself".
Fetishes are fetishes, mostly harmless and amost always voluntary in nature. Watch CSI, they do a great job exploring this topic. Just remember, its TV, not real life. No one dies everytime a fetish is explored. Just like every speeder on the highway doesn't always wreck and kill some innocent. Again, cudos to Brent, for bringing to light the double standard of the long hair board versus the short hair board.
As for Anne's accusations about some members and their perceived fetishes. I once thought that I did, and then decided I didn't and now don't care if I do or don't. I know what I like and I'm comfortable with that. Is it a sexual fetish when you are all grown up and realize that every "girlfriend" you had from age 6 to 14 had short hair. I doubt it, but they did. Since then, I've dated girls with all types of hair without preference, but almost always seem to have relationships with the short haired girls. I can't tell you why, but they seem to have a personality that I like better than girls with long hair (generalization here). If I have a short hair fetish, then Anne must surely have a long haired one.
Oh yeah, this is the Short Hair board, right???
Bye now!
!! `abadq a ,(40` )2$`b /4$ -$ %$, ,%$ `` .$
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Posted By: SanFranBrent
Date Posted: Jul 12, 2006 at 5:31pm
Merlin,
Your points are well taken.
%,
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Posted By: DaveDecker
Date Posted: Jul 16, 2006 at 2:40pm
|
[QUOTE=mikecuts]Why do some ladies have no fear of loosing their long locks?[/quote]
I suppose it is because those who choose to do so are firm of resolution.
Interesting path this conversation took. Hal first mentioned "fetish," which was debated some -- then dominated by Brent. Claude questioned mikecuts' credentials. Kuroneko first mentioned a double-standard, and then Brent ran with the ball...
[quote=Kuroneko]I just hate the way people are so quick to pounce on any short hair fans as freaks with weird fetishes, who need professional help, but not very often are such charges levelled against the long-hair fans of the boards -_- . It's very much a double standard, I think. [/quote]
Not true. I doubt that any of the long-hair fans think of people who prefer short hair as being freaks or of having weird fetishes. The long-hair fans on the boards support those who want it long, and otherwise encourage the individual to choose the length that they want, whether it's long, medium or short. The primary difference I see between the long and short forums is the manner in which support is given. Several (but not most) of the folks here seem to go for the hard sell... lovebobs comes to mind. Still, this is the short hair forum, and it doesn't elicit any complaints (that I am aware of), so it's okay.
Interesting to see the extent to which Brent got whipped up over these subjects...
[quote=SanFranBrent]You are being too defensive Anne. Relax lovely lady. I like your posts, but you get too defensive sometimes Anne.[/quote]
Hmm....
[quote=Merlin]
Anne, please get over the paranoia that everyone wants you to cut your hair.[/quote]
Where did this notion come from? (And who's paranoid?)
[quote=demodoll]I don't know that hairstyles and fashion are always about sex or sexuality. I work for a large corporation and have for the last 21 years. Most of the people who work there are trying (breaking their necks actually) to get ahead and their clothing and hairstyles are a direct reflection of that. Any hint of sexy is definitely NOT what you would want to do to get ahead in that place. It is much more conforming to the culture to look polished, professional, and conservative. That is not for everyone, of course, but for those who want that world sexy is the absolute last thing they would ever do. And there is nothing wrong with that. It is a conscious choice that some people make to get what they want.
So I think that hairstyles and fashion can also be about career and getting ahead in whatever chosen one a person has.[/quote]
My observation based on about 20 years of professional employment: within the past, oh, approximately 10 years, women in the corporate workplace are demonstrating a willingness to look (clothes and hair) more alluring / sexy -- and it isn't hurting their ability to perform their job well, or their advancement within the lower/middle ranks (I've no exposure to the upper echelons). |
Posted By: demodoll
Date Posted: Jul 16, 2006 at 6:51pm
|
In my company you still cannot wear open toed shoes, you must wear hose (even when it is 100 degrees outside) and I am quite sure a woman would get sent home if her skirt was too short or tight or her shirt too low cut. I have seen it happen. And visible tatoos would be an immediate cessation to any upward advancement. It is a pharmaceutical company. I don't think it is out of the norm. $ S bd`ter - ,,bb - 0b` /4! $(!, $- $%%, ` "6
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Posted By: SanFranBrent
Date Posted: Jul 16, 2006 at 7:31pm
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Many companies these days are more casual than that Demodoll.
%,
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Posted By: SanFranBrent
Date Posted: Jul 17, 2006 at 7:19am
Dave,
I don't get so whipped up. The topic is intriguing to me, so I express my beliefs in regards to it.
%,
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Posted By: demodoll
Date Posted: Jul 17, 2006 at 8:07am
|
I know that many companies are more casual right now but I still say that there are reason other than expressing sexuality for the way people dress. Getting ahead in a corporation or other work setting is one of them and the culture of the company generally dictates what is acceptable. Dressing sexy in many workplaces would be not be a way to get ahead so I think a lot of people, women especially, do "career dressing" which allows them to look the part of someone on their way up in that business. The way you dress can be instrumental in expressing a lot of things. $ S bd`ter - ,,bb - 0b` /4! $(!, $- $%%, ` "6
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Posted By: Sharyg11
Date Posted: Sep 5, 2006 at 12:44pm
|
Hi, Mike
To answer your original question, which I think many people might have miss-understood, I'm going to answer it from a personal point of view and from my personal experience.
I love long hair, but have cut it to short bobs (which I love) in several occasions. I do have to admit to you though, that the reason that made me take the plunge to cut it on those ocassions, was because my hair was damaged and I had to cut it. Otherwise, I would have kept it long. Usually I would be very hesitant about cuting it. But if is damaged, and I know it has to go, then it has to go. I guess the way I look at it on those occasions is: as much as I love my long hair, I rather have it short and looking pretty and healthy, rather than keep it long and looking damaged.
I have naturally very curly hair, which I wear straigth 99% of the time. However, if for any reason I'm not able to blow dry my hair straight, as long as it is long in length, I can still style it in a way in which it will look nice. Even if is just a curly pony tail. When my hair is short, I don't have that option, because my curly hair, will shink to very short curls and won't leave me much of a styling option. So for women with curly hair, short hair could actually be (in some occasions) more work that long hair, since you really have to keep it styled (specially a short bob) to keep it looking good.
For that reason, you will find that most curly haired women, such as myself are alot more hesitant to cut their long locks into short styles. Women with straight hair are usually less affraid of just taking the plunge and cutting off their hair. In my opinion because their hair will look good no matter what. They don't have to worry about humidity turning their new shorter locks in a frizzie fro. They can just wash and go, and just let their short hair air dry, and still look great. Even if they choose the bobs that have the buzz cut underneath; as the hair grows back it will look good. But If a curly haired girl chooses that cut, growing it out, will be painfull LOL. You will get those short little curls that are impossible to style when they are in between lenghts (not short but not long either). So cutting your hair into a more daring style when you have curlie locks, is a much bigger risk, and you are more prone to be dissapointed once you realized what a pain in the butt it is to have to keep the hair perfectly styled all the time in order for it to look good. And how time consuming that could be.
So that is why some women will just say, "what that heck, just cut it off, I'm just sick of of and want it gone". I bet you most of the time is a straight hair girl. Having the straight hair gives her that flexibility to take more chances, and trying more daring cuts. Where us curlie girls can not be that flexible, because we might get stuck looking awful for months, while growing out the wrong cut.
I know personally that if I had naturally straight hair (which most people think I do, just because I style it that way most of the time) I would deft. be more daring and try many more hair styles. But I'm limited because of my hair, so even when I cut it into a bob, it has to be long enough for me to tie it back if I need to (you know in case of emergency, suden rain and stuff like that LOL).
So personally I think that is why some women aren't afraid to just say "chop it off", while others would need to go through months of therapy before taking the plunge LOL!
I hope I have answered your question.
Much love, Shary
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Posted By: enfys
Date Posted: Sep 6, 2006 at 2:34pm
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Right I re-read the original post a few times. I think the reason some women have no fear is that it's not scary.
If you are at the point that you are in a salon you know what you want. When I got my first tattoo I had no fear as I knew the design was one I loved. And that was a more permanent decision than a haircut.
Yes, if a maniac fetishist lunged at me with blunt scissors I would be scared. Most people would be. But there's nothing to be scared of in carrying out an image change you want. $- P cn`dp0% 00BB .(4`p /.%%%,-)! !!%,!,`" !,
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