Desperate for help...

Hello all

well i have a huge hair disaster ,my hair used to be naturaly dirty blonde/light brown and i always got highlights and it looked great jennifer anniston kind of colour and my hair is very soft and silk straight and it was just beneath shoulders a hair that people was stopping me in street and shops to ask what's my salon ,and then i went into a bad abusive relationship it got me into a severe depression i done every colour u can imagine red,brown,blonde it even got that i done my hair half white and half pink !!

i was using dying my hair to cover how i was hurt and ended  with dying my hair every week which totally ruined it ...

now i m out of depression and had to dye my hair black from 5 months and from the way my hair is damaged it didnt even caught the dye and i dyed it like twice now i got this cherry black thingie that have like kinda of cooper blonde tint also which aint pretty i have like 4 inchs growth which coming off in weird dark colour

i have now a new guy which is amazing he adores beautiful hair and keep telling me in the sweetest way he can which i know he 100%means not to hurt me he travels alot so he like ask me babe need any hair care stuff for ur hair cuz  it looks kinda tired ...

i want to have beautiful hair again now i have a choice to chop it off to a really short cut  or to wait with this horrible horrible hair for like a year to have my hair back....

please help i  m so upset over it that i dont go out with my girls anymore  i feel i  m very ugly looking like this

Your photo is kind of yellow tinted so maybe I can't see it that well, but frankly, it looks nice to me and you are certainly not ugly (very pretty in fact).  To go from a dark color to match your roots (or back to your blonde highlights) is going to be more damaging.  It will have to be your choice whether you want to risk more damage or wait it out.  If you have 4 inches of roots growing in your natural color, its getting harder and harder to fix because your roots will not react to chemicals the same way your damaged ends will, so getting something that is all the same would be a big challenge.  It sounds like you must have had a good salon before where you got your highlights, you might want to go back to them and see what options they can offer you.

I did that my hairdresser want to cut my hair even shorter and he wants to put some red highlights in it ..and quite frankly i dont want to go all blonde again i discovered that bleaching the hair this way damage it severly so i'm planning to never go blonde again and stick to black , red and browns

thanks so much Susan for ur reply

OK Wild Kitty as a HairStylist I'm going to advise you that it's probably best to stay away from changing your hair color again. Any chemical service including color is damaging to the hair strands. Having your hairstylist tell you that you should be adding highlights in it is his way of saying..."HE NEEDS MORE INCOME" therefore he's suggesting you do some highlights so he can add $75 to your total bill. Regardless of color or bleaching any chemical service can be damaging to your hair if the stylist doesn't know what they are doing.

When you were dyeing your hair black what color were you going from? I can only assume that your ends of your hair are very porous and dry and probably rapidly absorb any color put on them. Susan W is right that the roots will not react or take the same color as your previously colored hair. You need to treat both of them differently to get them to the same color.

I think your best bet is to grow out your hair, deep condition your hair and then you can gradually lighten the previously colored hair to get a closer match to your natural hair color. It's going to take time the stylist will probably need to raise you 4 or 5 levels and that can be done in several visits versus one visit and in between deep condition your hair to even out the porosity and get your damaged hair into a better condition.

I'd recommend L'ANZA's 5 Step Deep Conditioning Treatment or Healthy Sexy Soy Salvation Deep Conditioning Treatments.

G'luck