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 They Don't Really Want My Advice.

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lycanammo View Drop Down
Newbie
Joined: Aug 01, 2012
Location:
Posted: Aug 04, 2012 at 11:50am
It never fails.  When my friends tell me their problems, I listen carefully and then when they ask...I always give them advice.  I never give advice unless they ask first.

But when I give advice, I can tell by their body language that they do not appreciate what I'm saying, even though they specifically asked me for my opinion.

How do I learn to stop myself from giving advise that will only get me in trouble.  Case in point, last week I told my BFF, when she asked, that she should break up with her longtime live-in.  He cheats, takes her money, lies to her face and then she comes to my house and breaks down.

Now she's mad at me.  I want off this crazy circle.  Advice?  Please. 

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Ericachristina View Drop Down
Junior Member
Joined: Mar 12, 2012
Location: USA
Posted: Aug 06, 2012 at 11:50am

A lot of the time people become mad when you tell them the truth because the truth can hurt and even though deep down they want to believe that your advice holds some merit they may feel ashamed, afraid, and in denial about whatever issues they are having. Some of the people I work with have a hard time hearing all the cold hard facts when you lay everything out in the open and address all their problems in a head on manner. It may be hard for them to cope with what you are saying and even harder for them to change. It doesn


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Karen Shelton View Drop Down
Admin Group
Joined: Nov 26, 2000
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Posted: Aug 06, 2012 at 11:50am
Hi Erica,
I completely agree with you.  People do get mad when you tell them the truth.  I think you provided amazing advice here.

Thanks so much.
Karen

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Ericachristina View Drop Down
Junior Member
Joined: Mar 12, 2012
Location: USA
Posted: Aug 08, 2012 at 11:50am

You are very welcome Karen. Smile


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rosaclinic View Drop Down
Newbie
Joined: Aug 27, 2012
Location:
Posted: Oct 07, 2012 at 11:50am
the best way to get out of this crazy thing is that always give a neutral advice and let the other person decide the final thing for him or herself. dont be the judge of the case and just give him points like a lawyer does. hope it helps!

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htt123456 View Drop Down
Newbie
Joined: Nov 28, 2012
Location:
Posted: Nov 30, 2012 at 11:50am
Hi Erica,
I completely agree with you.

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Sahara_desert View Drop Down
Newbie
Joined: Jan 18, 2013
Location: United States
Posted: Jan 28, 2013 at 11:50am
Very well said Erica!
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